Day 83: Never, Never, Never Forget…

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When you get married, a lot of new days by default become important to you. Of course, you have your anniversary, which you should never, never, never forget. Hopefully the day was memorable enough that this will be no problem.

Hopefully her birthday will also not be a problem, because it also needs to be recognized. The ones that are little trickier are the ones coming from your in-laws. It is a good idea in order to build bridges with them, to recognize them on their special days, such as their birthdays. Depending on the size of your in-law family, this could be a difficult task.

One thing that I found to help me is to set reminders on my phone. Nowadays, most phones will do this and will even let you set up the reminder as an annual event. Set a reminder for a day or a few days before the day to remind yourself to give that person a call or to do something nice for them.

After a while, these things will become routine so that you don’t have to rely on something else to remind you. If anything, this simply allows you to show that you take the time out of your busy life to pay attention to other people, which is an excellent way to strengthen your relationship with your wife and her family.

Day 56: Boys’ Father’s Day Jokes Part V

Source: http://boyslife.org/features/20917/20-funny-jokes-for-fathers-day/

Dan: I made a bad mistake today and gave my dad some soap flakes instead of corn flakes for breakfast.
Jan: Was he mad?
Dan: Yup. He was foaming at the mouth!

– Submitted by Daniel R., Dickinson, Tex.


Manny: How do you like the drum set you got for your birthday?
Theo: I love it!
Manny: Why?
Theo: Whenever I don’t play it, my dad gives me 10 bucks!

– Submitted by Alvin F., Union City, Calif.


Dad: Son, if you keep pulling my hair, you will have to get off my shoulders.
Tiger Cub: But, Dad, I’m just trying to get my gum back!

– Submitted by Ken R., Sparta, Mich.


Dear Dad,
$chool i$ great. I’m making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying hard. I $imply can’t think of anything I need, $o ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.
Love, Your $on

Dear Son,
I kNOw astroNOmy, ecoNOmics and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
Love, Dad

– Submitted by Jacob P., Orem, Utah

 

Day 49: Boys’ Father’s Day Jokes Part IV

Source: http://boyslife.org/features/20917/20-funny-jokes-for-fathers-day/

Jon: What’s the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot’s father?

Tom: What?

Jon: One’s a pop fly. The other’s a fly pop.

– Submitted by Jon W., Stroudsburg, Pa.

Teacher (on phone): You say Michael has a cold and can’t come to school today? To whom am I speaking?

Voice: This is my father.

– Submitted by Mike I., Midland, Mich.

Johnny’s father: Let me see your report card.

Johnny: I don’t have it.

Johnny’s father: Why not?

Johnny: My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.

– Submitted by Tyler H., Blacklick, Ohio

“Dad, are bugs good to eat?” asked the boy.

“Let’s not talk about such things at the dinner table, son,” his father replied.

After dinner the father inquired, “Now, son, what did you want to ask me?”

“Oh, nothing,” the boy said.  “There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone.”

– Submitted by Mark Y., Glendora, Calif.

A small boy was at the zoo with his father.  They were looking at the tigers, and his father was telling him how ferocious they were.

“Daddy, if the tigers got out and ate you up…”

“Yes, son?” the father asked, ready to console him.

“ …Which bus would I take home?”

– Submitted by Gholson D. G., Gaithersburg, Md.

Science teacher: When is the boiling point reached?

Science student: When my father sees my report card!

– Submitted by Michael H., Canton, Ohio

Joe: What does your father do for a living?

Jon: He’s a magician. He performs tricks, like sawing people in half.

Joe: Do you have any brothers or sisters?

Jon: Yep, four half-sisters and a half-brother.

– Submitted by Jonathan W., Stroudsburg, Pa.

Four men are in the hospital waiting room because their wives are having babies. A nurse goes up to the first guy and says, “Congratulations! You’re the father of twins.”

“That’s odd,” answers the man. “I work for the Minnesota Twins!”

A nurse says to the second guy, “Congratulations! You’re the father of triplets!”

“That’s weird,” answers the second man. “I work for the 3M company!”

A nurse tells the third man, “Congratulations! You’re the father of quadruplets!”

“That’s strange,” he answers. “I work for the Four Seasons hotel!”

The last man is groaning and banging his head against the wall. “What’s wrong?” the others ask.

“I work for 7 Up!”

– Submitted by Daniel C., Urbana, Ill.

A book never written: “Fatherly Advice” by Buck L. Upson.

– Submitted by Aaron and Andrew M., Redondo Beach, Calif.

Son: For $20, I’ll be good.

Dad: Oh, yeah?  When I was your age, I was good for nothing.

– Submitted by Robby S., Putnam Valley, N.Y.

Pee Wee: What do you call your dad when he falls through the ice?

Westy: Beats me.

Pee Wee: A POPsicle!

– Submitted by Philip K., Marshalltown, Iowa

Pee Wee: How is the baby bird like its dad?

Westy: How?

Pee Wee: It’s a chirp off the old block.

– Submitted by David D., Guyton, Ga.

Dad: How do you like fourth grade?

Son: It isn’t much fun.

Dad: That’s too bad. It was the best three years of my life!

– Submitted by Luke A., Tucson, Ariz.

Son: Dad, do you know the difference between a pack of cookies and a pack of elephants?

Dad: No.

Son: Then it’s a good thing Mom does the grocery shopping!

– Submitted by Steven F. II, Naperville, Ill.

Jacob: I have a lot of my dad’s genes.

Dave: Really? I bet they don’t fit.

– Submitted by David B., North Muskegon, Mich.

Dad: You’ll never amount to anything because you procrastinate.

Son: Oh yeah? Just you wait!

– Submitted by Matt A., Bellevue, Neb.

Boys’ Life Father’s Day Jokes, Part I

Many lessons my father taught me came through my membership in the Boy Scouts of America. Between campouts and pinewood derbies, I eagerly watched the mailbox for my copy of Boys’ Life, the scouting magazine.

Sure, I read some things about mainstream scouting, but I have to admit, I always read the jokes first.

Source: http://boyslife.org/features/20917/20-funny-jokes-for-fathers-day/

 

Jon: What’s the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot’s father?

Tom: What?

Jon: One’s a pop fly. The other’s a fly pop.

– Submitted by Jon W., Stroudsburg, Pa.

Teacher (on phone): You say Michael has a cold and can’t come to school today? To whom am I speaking?

Voice: This is my father.

– Submitted by Mike I., Midland, Mich.

Johnny’s father: Let me see your report card.

Johnny: I don’t have it.

Johnny’s father: Why not?

Johnny: My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.

– Submitted by Tyler H., Blacklick, Ohio

“Dad, are bugs good to eat?” asked the boy.

“Let’s not talk about such things at the dinner table, son,” his father replied.

After dinner the father inquired, “Now, son, what did you want to ask me?”

“Oh, nothing,” the boy said.  “There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone.”

– Submitted by Mark Y., Glendora, Calif.

Day 22: It Worked for Martin

“Now you tell me, when a father goes ahead and washes diapers or performs some other mean task for his child, and someone ridicules him as an effeminate fool, though that father is acting in the spirit just described and in Christian faith, my dear fellow you tell me, which of the two is most keenly ridiculing the other? God, with all his angels and creatures, is smiling, not because that father is washing diapers, but because he is doing so in Christian faith. Those who sneer at him and see only the task but not the faith are ridiculing God with all his creatures, as the biggest fool on earth. Indeed, they are only ridiculing themselves; with all their cleverness they are nothing but devil’s fools.”
― Martin Luther

Now, of course, I don’t know him personally, but Martin Luther seems like he must have been a great dad!  His advice, those hundreds of years old, is still great for day: fatherhood is about service.  Not only that, but “father” is a title that even God keeps for himself. He provides for us in small and great ways every day, serving His many children however they each need help.

There are those who might say that some aspects of fatherhood, changing diapers included, aren’t “manly”. Those who do this forget what they are actually mocking: godly service, doing things for others that they simply can’t do for themselves. I don’t think there’s anything more “manly” than that.

Day 15:The Pillar of the Family

Pillar

“Since human fatherhood, as a reflection of the Fatherhood of God, was designed to be the pillar of the family, the disappearance of esteem for fatherhood has led to the collapse of that pillar and to the disintegration of the family.”
― Joseph A. CirrincioneSt. Joseph, Fatima and Fatherhood

There are so many distractions from fatherhood in our modern world. Unsure economic climates provide increasing pressure on men who provide for their families to throw themselves into their work. At times, I have worked multiple jobs just to make sure we had enough to buy food and pay rent. When I was in college, I worked a graveyard shift and then went to school full time so that I barely had any time remaining.  I only had brief moments with my young son.

Providing for your family is a noble thing, but being a provider is more than just bringing home a paycheck. Your family has emotional needs as well, needs that can be best fulfilled by a father and a mother working together. I found that even though I was tired, and wanted to either sleep or play video games, I needed to make it a priority to take the little time I had and spend it wisely. I looked for little times to play with my son, to do an extra feeding, or even to get up with him in the middle of the night on weekends. Even if you don’t have a large quantity of time, you can make it high quality time.

Question: What can I do to find additional quality time with my kids even if it is short?

Day 14: Twelve Tests to See If You’re Ready to Be a Parent

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I know that before I became a father, I didn’t know if I was ready to be one.  I did have the advantage of having been raised as the oldest of eight children, and so having young children around wasn’t a completely foreign concept. I had changed diapers, dressed and fed children, and had logged many hours of tending them growing up.

Then again, I always had the safety net of my parents. Now, this child was going to be my own. The buck would stop with me.

I found this lighthearted site the other day that helps you realize whether or not you are ready to put up with the ups and downs of parenthood.

Follow the link and see what you’re in for: http://fatherhood.about.com/gi/o.htm?zi=1/XJ&zTi=1&sdn=fatherhood&cdn=parenting&tm=13&f=20&tt=14&bt=1&bts=14&zu=http%3A//www.thelaboroflove.com/forum/nick/parenthood.html

Question: How many do you think you can handle? These are only the first steps… What tests would you add to these?

Day 11: Top 10 Ways to Get Your Child to Help with a Household Project

If your kids are like my kids, you spend much of your parenting energy being a motivational speaker. Why not try some of the following tactics?

  • 10. Scatter gummy bears on the floor nearby.
  • 9.   Unpack your old ukulele and make up a ‘good helper’ song.
  • 8.   “If you don’t, Mommy and I will start smooching in front of you.”
  • 7.   Post embarrassing pictures of them on the family web site until the work is finished.
  • 6.   Tell them it involves paint … and a shovel.
  • 5.   Turn up the music WAY LOUD.
  • 4.   Promise not to rub their toys under your arm pits.
  • 3.   Remind them about the ancient proverb: “Thou that helpest will not incur the wrath of revelation, nor grow the spines of itchiness upon thy back.”
  • 2.   Perform your trusty tap dance routine.
  • 1.   Shameless bribery.

Source: http://www.fathers.com/content/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=328&Itemid=134

Question: What other methods do you use to encourage your children to help out around the house? It is very easy to resort to yelling or becoming frustrated, but with a little imagination, you can find other ways to motivate your kids.

Day 8: “Abba-Dear Father”

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“Abba is not Hebrew, the language of liturgy, but Aramaic, the language of home and everyday life … We need to be wary of the suggestion … that the correct translation of Abba is ‘Daddy.’ Abba is the intimate word of a family circle where that obedient reverence was at the heart of the relationship, whereas Daddy is the familiar word of a family circle from which all thoughts of reverence and obedience have largely disappeared … The best English translation of Abba is simply ‘Dear Father.”

― Thomas A. SmailThe Forgotten Father 

Everything in the life of Jesus Christ was meant to serve as an example to us. As such, the relationship between Jesus and His Father should serve as an example of the relationship between a father and son.  It is vital to realize that Jesus had the “obedient reverence” for His Father based on mutual trust, respect, and love. In short, His Father was worthy of respect.

How wonderful it would be if each of your children would think of you as “Dear Father”.  It is something that will not come without effort—you will have to live in a way worthy of your children’s respect.

Question: How do I need to change my life in order to be worthy of the respect of my children?

Day 7: iDad

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Dealing with the level of technology we do today is not something generations before us faced to such an overwhelming degree. What might have seemed like Star Trek technology 20 years ago is readily accessible today. Captain Kirk could only wish he had an iPhone!

Technology can be a great thing, even in parenting. My children especially love to use my iPhone to take pictures and then look at them afterwards. They pose doing something funny and then I snap a picture of them and vice versa. There are all sorts of educational games and interactive storybooks for smart phones that can be used to facilitate time with your children.

Contrary to how it may seem, the human brain can only truly concentrate on one thing at once. If you are checking your email, getting an update on sport scores, or updating your status, you can’t really pay attention to your kids. I’m not saying that you should all throw your phones down the nearest storm drain, but each of us needs to be vigilant.

I make it a point to set aside a time, for me, right after work, in which I turn my phone off and concentrate completely on my children. I let them tell me what they want to do, and fully invest my time in them. My kids are so entertaining most days, they put any app to shame.