Day 193: Know When to Bring Up Issues

“Never Go To Bed Angry.”

Or should you? Many aspects of having a good marriage come down to timing. During the course for marriage, there will from time to time come issues that you need to discuss with your spouse. It can be tempting to do this right when you think about it, but I caution you to evaluate how you feel before jumping into discussing a major issue.

If you try to breach a major topic when you’re feeling exhausted, frustrated, or sad from the get-go, the conversation is more likely to escalate into a conflict. It is easier for quiet rational voices to turn into your irrational yelling ones. For best results, it is imperative to start from a place of strength emotionally and physically so that is easier to control yourself and exercise patience and restraint.

If you enter into serious conversation and find yourself becoming angry or frustrated, there is no shame in stepping back from the situation, tabling the conversation for another time. It is amazing what a good night’s sleep will do for your mental and physical health. That’s why my wife and I try not to discuss serious matters late at night, but in the morning or sometime during the day so that we are more likely to be our best selves.

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